30th November 2024 – (Hong Kong) Crypto mogul Justin Sun has decided to abandon his whimsical plan to purchase 100,000 bananas. This decision comes hot on the heels of his recent acquisition of a duct-taped banana for a jaw-dropping US$6.24 million—a perfectly reasonable sum for a piece of conceptual art, of course.
Sun’s initial idea was to express gratitude to the original vendor, a humble Manhattan fruit seller who let go of the prized banana for a mere 25 cents. However, it seems the vendor quickly realised that Sun’s grand banana buyback was less feasible than anticipated. With the vendor dismissing the plan as impractical and unlikely to yield any profit, Sun promptly scrapped the whole affair and returned to contemplating the deeper meanings of fruit and art at the Peninsula hotel in Hong Kong.
In front of a throng of eager journalists and influencers, Sun took a moment to enjoy an actual banana, proclaiming it to be “much better than other bananas.” Riveting insights like these are what make him a titan of industry, folks. He lauded the artwork as “iconic,” somehow drawing parallels between conceptual art and cryptocurrency—a connection that surely had the art world collectively nodding in agreement.
The artwork in question, titled “Comedian,” by Italian artist Maurizio Cattelan, has sparked debates about its legitimacy as art since its debut at Art Basel in 2019. Sun, clearly a man of sophisticated taste, confessed he felt a mix of disbelief and clarity within seconds of winning the bid, leading him to the profound conclusion that eating the banana at a press conference could somehow contribute to its artistic legacy.
Adding to the mix of Sun’s eclectic ventures, he recently became an advisor to World Liberty Financial, a crypto initiative linked to none other than Donald Trump, after a sizable $30 million investment. Sun insists that his involvement is purely apolitical, which is a comforting thought for those of us concerned about the intersection of fruit, finance, and politics.
When asked about his recent legal challenges, including allegations of fraud from the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, Sun remained undeterred, focusing instead on the bright future of both bananas and cryptocurrency. “I think the price is probably going to go up even more in the future, just like Bitcoin,” he mused, leaving us all to wonder what other fruits might be ripe for speculation.
